Sunday, September 23, 2012

Less Blabbing, More Camwhoring




Lately I have not been too active in Facebook. Some status updates every other day, funny picture, comment here and there. Some might think that I am busy studying at home cramming my head with knowledge on the verge of finishing medical school. Though I am so glad that people think of me that way, I would like to burst your bubble, it’s a wishful thinking. 

I noticed some downward pattern in FB nowadays. Now even attention whores update once daily. It breeds cycle of event. The cause and effect. When you see that your friends not active in FB, you might think that they are busy living life or studying. If you were seen too active in FB, they might label you as loser who couldn’t get a life. Others will mirror the same action and assumption resulting in vicious cycle of FB inactivity, which is not a bad thing at all. Everybody is out and about, upping their cool standard these days. Hipster’s principles apply to everybody. Updating your FB status too frequent is sooo yesterday, uncool.

With slight fall of FB significant, along come rising of Instagram giant. Since it become available for Android users, its popularity surge spiking on steep raising angle. Everyone is an artistic photographer now, every little thing worth capturing. The adage of ‘a picture paints a thousand words’ severely abused. The showing-off trend regarded as ‘in’ and hipsters-approved as cool. The proof is rock-solid with picture rather than mere FB statement; that you are so cool to be here and there, hanging with those cool friends, eating this and that (I fell mostly on the latter).

The one pattern that never seems to cease and at its persistent raise is sharing baby pictures. Some of them are not even neonates anymore, they are toddlers, some babies not even cute anymore, some never even cute to begin with. Baby stop being cute once they reach 1.5 to 2 year-old sometimes earlier. Why are you still flooding my wall with it though? Acceptable baby picture update in my book of baby-pic-sharing etiquette are (1) the first day of birth, (2) 1st birthday, (3) 1st day of school and please stop at that mandatorily. Some proud parents even go such extent creating FB account for their newborn, breaking age limit rules. Too excited to share to the world the fruit of their loin, a fertile proof. This offense is done by majority stay-at-home mom, or working mom on weekend hysteria.

I don’t need to see your baby sick, doing boring stuff (watching TV, sleep etc.), acting – too hard by forced of parent – cute, etc. Even society weans their attention to Suri soon right after her adorable face hits tabloid. No awe factor anymore.  

If you are too keen on capturing your baby milestones in worldwide web, store it somewhere in cloud storage or Picasa. Even the Optimist Priest will find it offensive feeling obligated to reply ‘Oh, she/he is so adorable/cute/charming’. Putting your baby as profile/cover picture is major offense. Let alone some random baby picture. Beware, those people who add you as soon as you put baby picture as DP most probably paedophile. Kids aren’t supposed to act, wear or appear as adult, they are baiting paedophiles attention. Some even put naked picture of their baby, destroying their child reputation at early age. Go be a good parent, broadcast your child to the world.

“You are literally too stupid to insult.” Stu Price, The Hangover



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