Much Ado About Attachment!

I swear to God that my amygdala was infected with progressive Guillan-Barre Syndrome (learn to pronounce ‘Guyan Bareh’) [cam bunyi nama Orang Asli plak kan <-- oh no, BM!] the last time I post about quit blogging stuff. Maybe that night the caffeine haven’t kick in yet. That last cup of green tea [yes Oprah! I’ve been drinkin’ it for 5 years now, so now you go lose some pounds!!] have built me tolerance. I told you that BOH lighter taste version is a marketing crap Obama! Should stick with Dilmah or that China brand Sea Dyke [yes Panchita, it uses Dyke as a brand, last time I heard ‘dyke’ was when my friend throwing tantrum against some tomboy lesbian chick]. See my stained teeth, tannic acid has done a great job on me, even that cursed Colgate Total Whitening [this is the one I bought before the boycott <-- see I’m being sincere] can’t remove it. Another marketing crap by Colgate. [of course Pedro, boycott it]

Now let’s go straight to the point. What was it again? [Mr. Alzheimer, please tick that check box stating, ‘recent memory loss’ on you neurological examination sheet]. Oh okay, now I remember. Since I’ve posted a blog about doing Clinical Attachment, there are such airs of competitiveness among my coursemate. They are all excited and wanted to experience it themselves. Well, all I can tell you it wasn’t playground down the hospital. Must get yourself well prepared for it. We bring about our course and university reputation and it will be at stake if you commit mistake. As you all know, it is okay to do mistake in account calculation, it’s okay to seal a bad deal with customer, but it’s never okay to barter deal with people’s life.

People have been asking me how to write the letter to apply for attachment. My answer, just like every letter. State which unit you wanted to attach to and be well acquaintance with all the knowledge regarding that unit.

If the doctor asks you such question that you find it hard to recall from your thalamus or maybe it never existed in that certain Diencephalon region at a first place, just say “I don’t know”. I understand how this words is bad for your ego, but being less knowledgeable is better than being Mr. Pretentious Know It All (see even prounouncing is a hell of an effort). After all, you are there to learn and experience and observe. Don’t get me wrong that you don’t even study for it. Important stuff to remember all the normal value or interval for electrolyte, blood count, PCO2, PO2 and etc. If you forgot, don’t fret, lab sheet result sometimes put the normal value together. Don’t forget the anatomy and physiology to. Because they understand we are human, and human aren’t like elephant, we forget stuff.

Don’t forget to enjoy your attachment and never forget to write down everything that you’ve learned. Unless your brain is absorbing info like sponge [even sponge may lost it once you squeeze it], bring your memo pad and one more thing, it’s useful to have in hand Clinical Medicine book (pocket edition), if you can’t afford it, steal it at Kamal and don’t get caught. [I am off responsibility for this]

Be patient if you are asked take patient history, some patient are just skeptical towards medical students, best thing to do is to slap them on the face and say “I’m going to help you to help yourself, you don’t like it, it’s your problem, deal with it!” and if they respond with hostility, look around if anyone sees you, grab a pillow and smother them for few minutes enough to put them in comma. Once they in comma, shut down the ventilating machine and walla! You just kill one patient. Of course I’m joking.

Okay! That’s all I think. Any question? Comment me below. Use your finger to type before arthritis robs you of ability.